I'm Mike, I play rugby and I write match reports for giggles and to sometimes go in the paper. Most of them are written as first drafts so apologies if there's typos but I can't be arsed to go back and fix them all...yet. I'm also a Chiropractor and I write occasional articles on health as well as the occasional other fart-arsing. It's very amateur so don't go taking it too seriously!

Tuesday, 25 November 2014

Withycombe v Hayle

Withycombe Trump Hayle with Second Half Storm

Raleigh Park boys keep the pressure on leaders Saltash with a comfortable victory


Withycombe 39
Hayle 3

Hayle were put to the sword at Raleigh Park with an assured performance in difficult conditions by Withycombe.

With the Clubhouse End being more suited to bog snorkelling than rugby, the hosts had their work cut out scoring in the first half. Four penalties in the Hayle 22 early on gave Withycombe a one-man advantage and skipper John Parkin decided to take the three points at the fourth time of asking. The decision paid off as Withycombe could then attack from deep, and before long a blindside break put lovable rogue Jimmy Holman in for a try on his return to first team rugby.

The conditions dictated the game in the first half as handling errors abounded, the only obvious bright spot being Mike Richards' offload to Eugene Badenhorst, the South African man of the match running in the first try of his hat-trick with glee. The teams turned round at 17-3 but Hayle had rarely threatened the Withyocmbe tryline. The second half continued in a similar fashion, Dave Richards' yellow card not helping matters; but Hayle began to crumble after Withycombe's return to a full complement.

The score that got the floodgates open was Badenhorst's second on 63 minutes; not long afterward Sam Conway got on the end of some good interplay and Badenhorst capped a frantic ten minutes with his third, a frankly ridiculous diving pirouetting score in the corner with most of his body in the air outside the field of play. The now inevitable Mike Richards short-ranger looked extremely tame by comparison four minutes later but at least gave Glenn Channing a chance to kick a goal at the Brook End. All in all, another 5-pointer which keeps the pressure on leaders Saltash who failed to make the most of their trip to whipping boys South Molton; Withycombe will be looking to pile on the points when they visit in two weeks time. Meanwhile Teignmouth await in the Devon Cup next week; a real test of Withycombe's ambitions in the next league up.


Withycombe: Jack Pugsley, Jimmy Holman (1T), Aaron Conway, Joe Parkin, Sam Conway (1T), Glenn Channing (3C, 1P), John Parkin, Liam Cullen, Dave Richards (YC), Phil Sluman, Dave Sims, Matt Bragg, Andrei Toma, Eugene Badenhorst (3T, MoM), Mike Richards (1T). Reps: Dan Carey, Ben Clarke, Adam Morris.

Tuesday, 18 November 2014

Saltash v Withycombe



Ashes Topple Withy


Saltash come out on top as both sides play to their strengths in ten-try thriller 


Saltash 37
Withycombe 35

Saltash brought Withycombe's 14-game winning streak to an end in a pulsating top of the table clash at Moorlands Lane on Saturday.

After some tight early exchanges, a long range try from Saltash with 23 minutes gone put them 10-0 up with Withycombe looking somewhat rattled. The visitors fought their way back into the game as they reverted to their strength: smash mouth rugby. Withycombe's forwards had their nose to the grindstone as they worked their way up the field, with their scrum once again scoring a pushover try to get them back into the game. More of the same put the visitors in the lead at the break as Withycombe took a stranglehold on the game. The lineout drive was foiled but the pick-and-go opened the door for Andrei Toma to pick up a vital score on his return to first team rugby.

With Danny Sansom sent to the sin bin five minutes before half time, the first five minutes of the second half would always be a challenge for Withycombe, but no one expected what came next. Saltash all but put the game to bed with 12 explosive minutes of all out attack, scoring three long range tries and a penalty to go from 14-10 down to 32-14 up.

Having lost the control that brought them back into game in the first half, the visitors regained some composure and a try from Jon Axon off a lineout drive helped to settle some nerves. Withycombe now trailed by 11 points with 24 minutes still to go. Joe Parkin was sent to the sin bin on 60 minutes but Withycombe still managed another pushover try to bring themselves within four points with eight minutes to play. Yet another long range try from Saltash's back line might have killed Withycombe spirits two years ago, and it certainly created some noise around the clubhouse, but Withycombe weren't quite done yet.


Mike Richards' solo effort from 35 metres out was converted by Glenn Channing to leave Withycombe two points adrift and had the Withycombe fly half's knee not been hurt with a late tackle just a minute into the game, a kickable penalty with 90 seconds left on the clock might have extended Withycombe's unbeaten run. Instead they kicked for the corner, where a knock on 5 metres out was not enough to deter them. After turning over the scrum, a third pushover try was too much to ask and Channing was bundled into touch on the final whistle. The result means Saltash leapfrog Withycombe at the top of the league table on points difference. The Raleigh Park boys must now pick themselves up and send a strong message to the league when Hayle come to visit next week.

Withycombe: Jack Pugsley, Danny Sansom, Aaron Conway, Joe Parkin (YC), Sam Conway, Glenn Channing, John Parkin, Phil Sluman, Dave Richards, Liam Cullen, Jon Axon (1T), Dave Sims, Andrei Toma (1T), Simon Tozer, Mike Richards (3T). Reps: Max Cooke, Richard Hodges, Adam Morris.

Monday, 3 November 2014

Withycombe v Falmouth


Bragging Rites to Withycombe



Green & Black stay top after Matt bags debut try


Withycombe 46
Falmouth 13

Falmouth are the latest to fall foul of free-scoring Withycombe as the Hulham Road boys extended their unbeaten run at the summit of the Cornwall & Devon league.

Falmouth took the lead with a penalty on ten minutes but the rest of the half was one way traffic with Withycombe's pack once again spearheading the charge. A scrum against the head gave quick blindside ball to stand-off Gunboat Channing, whose fleetness of foot took him round the hapless Falmouth winger to score in the corner. After adding a penalty, some good hands from the forwards gave Matt Bragg a debut try, Liam Cullen and the evergreen Dave Sims providing the assist. Falmouth hit back with a penalty on 29 minutes before Withycombe put the game to bed with an explosive ten minute spell.

First Glenn Channing scored a carbon copy of his first try...Almost. Having crossed the whitewash, Channing tried to make the conversion attempt easier but got held up over the line in the process. This only postponed matters as at the ensuing scrum the Withycombe pack gifted No.8 Mike Richards yet another 30cm barnstormer of a try. Channing ended up nailing the conversion from the touchline to add insult to his injured pride.

A break from a midfield scrum by Richards then played man of the match Eugene Badenhorst in, only for the South African to be penalised for a double movement in the act of scoring. After ambitiously tapping on their own line, Falmouth then turned the ball over and John Parkin scored under the posts at the Brook End after a couple of phases. Withycombe then put the exclamation point on the first stanza with a stunning move right from the kickoff. Badenhorst got the move started and after some good link play from the Parkin brothers, Jack Pugsley and Badenhorst again, Joe Parkin crossed the line to make it 34-6 at the break.

In the second half things slowed down a bit as Withycombe took their foot of the accelerator. Glenn Channing's incisive passing allowed Aaron Conway to put Danny Sansom in at Clubhouse Corner, before Falmouth hit back with a try of their own. Kevin Rodwell was a victim of his own enthusiasm as he was sin binned within seconds of taking the field, and Falmouth pounced on the reeling 14 men of Withycombe to claw back some dignity. Withycombe did manage one more try, a charactieristic score from Eugene Badenhorst as he ripped the ball from a Falmouth player on the Falmouth five metre line, before charging through two people for five points.

Withycombe visit Teignmouth in the Devon Intermediate Cup next week before D-Day at second-placed Saltash on the 15th.

Withycombe: Jack Pugsley (1T), Sam Conway, Aaron Conway, Jack Pugsley, Joe Parkin (1T, YC), Glenn Channing (1T, 4C, 1P), John Parkin (1T), Dave Wellbeloved, Liam Cullen, Phil Sluman, Matt Bragg (1T), Dave Sims, Eugene Badenhorst (1T, MoM), Simon Tozer, Mike Richards (1T). Reps: Max Cooke, Richard Hodges, Kevin Rodwell (YC).