Exeter University 4th XV 0
AECC RFC 14
Wednesday 19th January 2011
A jaded and fake-tanned AECC travelled the two hours down the A35 to Exeter for only their 4th game of the season. The team arrived at the pitch, which was seemingly miles from the changing room, a full ten minutes prior to kick-off. Not being ones to mess around, some lineout calls and backs moves were cobbled together and the match had kicked off. No apologies are made for lack of details, since no one can remember that much.
The college boys were clearly in no mood to mess about. Well, to put it more accurately, they were collectively in even more ornery a mood than usual. About as happy as a slug in a salt pot. Etc. Regardless, the AECC pounded at the Exeter defence, eventually being the beneficiaries of a penalty award. At two minutes in, this seemed like as good a time as any for a rest, so the ball was given to Dan “Polly” Pollard, who just shanked it wide of the posts.
Pollard would soon make up for that, though. A dropped ball in the Exeter midfield was hacked on by the dashing No.10, and despite his condition, won the foot race to flop over the ball in the goal area. Pollard then stepped up to add the extras.
The next and final try came from the one piece of actual rugby that this “reporter” can remember, and resulted in Joe “Frosty” Frost being on the end of some wonderful hands and just failing to not score. He also managed to narrowly avoid not scoring just close enough to the posts that Dan “Polly” Pollard could only see one set, and therefore slot the conversion.
Thereafter the rugby appears to have ceased in this contest, with the Exeter outside-half leaving the field with a bloody nose. His replacement (known only as #21) promptly saw fit to hit Dan “Polly” Pollard high and late, the referee utterly lacking the testicles to do anything about it.
In a completely unrelated incident, Joe “Frosty” Frost was sin binned shortly afterwards for a high, late swinging arm tackle on Exeter’s #21. Sadly, the lack of video evidence precludes the club from making an appeal against this most unjust of decisions. It was around this time that the Chiros’ resident ASBO terrorist Ben “Benny” Rutter sadly had to leave the field suffering a broken nose (it’s not what you think... No, really. REALLY.) The real tragedy of which was the front row cover that the Chiros had brought with them. To the disappointment of literally everyone, Mike “Mick” Richards stepped into the front row, where he would stay for the remainder. All the while, making sure that everyone knew how much of a sacrifice it was (quite a big one).
Halftime score was 14-0. The Chiros didn’t really look like scoring, but then again neither did Exeter. Then again again, the match was no longer about the score. It was about #21.
In a completely unrelated incident, Matt “Bates” Bateman was sent to the sin bin shortly after the return of Joe “Frosty” Frost for a late high tackle which was once again very harshly judged. Very little else happened to be fair, Mike “Mick” Richards had a minor scrap, but obviously no-one was going to get hurt in that. And obviously Exeter didn’t score because, well, this is a defence that gave up 5.2 points a game last year.
So, to man of the match. As is becoming customary, the team bus home was a jolly affair, and at the Crown Inn, Bridport, Dan “Polly” Pollard ran away with it, and became the latest proud recipient of “Blacktion Man”. Joe Frost was ajudged to have been dick of the day and as a result was awarded a night’s pleasure of wearing the Clivesie.
Big hands also go to, well, just about everyone, but particularly Dom “Dommy” Jaskulski – getting his first rugby scar and wiping up the blood with the tissues he kept in his rugby shorts. What a man!
This latest win sees the boys still unbeaten in the league, with five games to go and their eye on a second consecutive title. Next league game is at home against Southampton Uni 2nd XV on Wednesday, 2nd February. Also, don’t miss the visit of the Chiros from WIOC for a friendly game this Sunday.
AECC: Struan “Struan” Brown, Josh “Josho” Arden, Ben “Benny” Rutter, Alex “Horne” Horne, Callum “Big C” Forrest, Dean “Deano” Matthews, Dominik “Dommy” Jaskulski, Mike “Mick” Richards, Scott “Gimbo” Gimby, Dan “Polly” Pollard, Kristian “Tintin” Gjermundrød, Joe “Frosty” Frost, Matt “Bates” Bateman (c), Clive “Karl” Hurkett, Ricky “See” Davis. Reps: Adam “Ads” Endler, Damian “Damo” Le Roux, Daniel “Alright Butt” Waldin.
AECC RFC: Not bad for something we just threw together
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